Saturday, June 26, 2010

Free floating anxiety

So, how do you deal with the free-floating anxiety associated with all that needed to get done before the trip, the RHS Jazz Euro-Adventure? Get it all done? Remember all the details? Like, where IS the toilet articles kit that I wanted to wash? And, why wake up at 5:30 to remember that one? Deal with the fretting moms, lists, organization that no one will pay attention to once we are underway? Pack, repack, buy the essentials and non-essentials and the superfluous. Once we shove off, get on the plane, much will subside, replaced by other trip-related anxieties, no doubt. Got to remember that others will suck up the leadership role, and I can comfortably slip into a role.

Part of how I deal with it is, get on the bike and ride. Lance was right, the bike is a source of zen comfort, healing a way to get those demons back in line. This year, I just haven't ridden as much as in the past, part of not having a big century for which to train, part because of a crazy schedule, teaching lots of classes, the OCL project (the reporting requirements to get paid are a stupid hassle), GR, QM and all the other very good stuff I'm in the middle of at TLF. And, the youngest one graduates, getting ready to go North of the Border, and the middle one shows up with a keeper (!), and C is busy with real estate, so life is good and busy, and somewhat full, and fulfilling, but still, not enough saddle time to arrest the free-floating anxiety.

On the current Notes to Self list:

* Yoga, yoga, yoga-- Stretch, breathe, stretch, breathe
* Ride more. Drive less.
* More salad, less sandwiches
* Less poetry, more problem-solving.
* Less TV, more reading, more films!
* Keep it simple.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Kent drops out of Tour Divide, a ride underscored by tragedy. Oil continues to flow into the Gulf and stupidity reigns. The national debate, narrative is depressing. World Cup is a mitigator. Tour de France will be on during our trip. Lots of other news may be adding to the FFA, and maybe it's time to unplug a bit, get away from the tweets and FB updates, certainly the Bb world, and get back into the Zen. The bike is good for the Zen.

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